In my last letter to a Junior Officer (or Company Grade Officer in USMC parlance), I talked about the importance of the relationships you form with those under your care.  In this post, I want to unravel the mystery of relating to your peers.

As I mentioned earlier, gaining and maintaining relationships within your squadron, and within the aviation community in general, is crucial to your future within this “gun club.” If the relationships with your subordinates is the cornerstone of your Officership, it is the relationship with your peers that is the floor and walls.

The most important aspect to building a relationship with your peers is to establish the fact that you are a man or woman of integrity and that they can trust you.

Being a man or woman of integrity is vital to earning the trust of your peers and growing in relationship with them.  As young Marine Officers, we all believe in having integrity – but often need some ideas of what integrity looks like at a practical level.

• Share the gouge: At some point, you are going to stumble across a fact, a life hack, a tidbit of information that your peers have not.  Share this with them.  Don’t do it over email.  Go to their office and tell them, and while you are there –
• See if they want a coffee: Better yet, ask them if they want to run to the coffee shop or seven day store.  If they don’t, then ask if you can grab them something.  When you go to the coffee shop or seven day store to get a drink, bring back a few extras for the boys.
• Suck up at least one bad deal:  When it comes to the duty schedule, ODO schedule, or shitty little jobs schedule, take your fair share.  If a peer gets stuck on a day that is not convenient for him – if at all possible – take it.
• Buy the first round: Always.  If you don’t enjoy beer, that is fine, but still buy the first round – then, sit back and enjoy the conversations.
• Have Their Back:  We all make mistakes, but what is important is how you stand up for your peers when they make a mistake that may make you “look bad.”  Never.  Ever.  Throw them “under the bus.”  Defend them,  support them, and build them back up when they falter.  

It is the final bullet that is the hardest, but the most important in developing a relationship with, and earning the trust of, your peers.  There are many Officers in the squadron who will happily buy a round, but when push comes to shove, leave others high and dry.  

Always remember, integrity wins every time.  Take care of your peers and they will take care of you.